Generally, battering does not occur constantly. According to Dr. Lenore Walker (who studied domestic violence and abused women), about two-thirds of the acts of spousal abuse follow an identifiable cycle of violence: build-up of tension, incident of acute battering, and loving contrition.

When the woman perceives balance between costs of the abuse and benefits of the husband's positive behaviors (loving contrition), the relationship stays relatively stable. When the costs outweigh the benefits, the wife may try to pull away, which may evoke either increased abuse or an attempt to seduce the wife back into the relationship.

Additionally, the wife stays because she believes her husband will change. She may also fear that her departure will trigger additional violence, a belief seemingly supported by research that indicates 70% of spousal abuse occurs after the spouse has attempted to leave.

Cycle of Abuse Model:

1. Phase 1: Tension building stage - anger, blaming and arguing.

2. Phase 2: Acute battering incident - hitting, slapping, use of weapons, sexual abuse, and/or verbal threats and abuse.

3. Phase 3: Honeymoon phase or calm stage - male may deny violence, make excuses, or apologize and promise reform. This stage may decrease or vanish as the pattern continues.